Toddler or Vampire? | Giftie Etcetera: Toddler or Vampire?

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Toddler or Vampire?

Loyal readers, a friend needs help. I won't name her, to protect her innocent little 1 1/2 year old vampire, but she might comment and reveal herself anyway. ;) It's just that I know a lot of my loyal readers are parents and they might have some ideas for her.

Her little one keeps biting at school. The school seems to be reacting appropriately. They are watching him very closely, immediately telling him no and giving him a very brief timeout, and staying in close contact with my friend. They are giving the "victims" lots of positive attention. They've talked to my friend about getting him something for his mouth (a paci or sippy cup or something) for school. (Everyone acknowledges that this is a regression, but they are trying to respond to his need to chew and save vunerable human flesh, so it might be worth it.) My friend is putting him to bed earlier (to make sure he is well-rested), punishing him constant with the school's policy when he uses violence at home (stern no biting/hitting, brief timeout), and doing role-play of being nice to friends. She is also working on assisting him with his communication skills.

This little one is sweet and wonderful. He truly is. Ander plays well with him. He's not a mean kid. He just bites and slaps.

I figured someone, out of all my loyal readers, has the solution. So I'm putting it out there. Any ideas (crazy, controversial, untested) are welcome.



Stac Cole said...

Crazy here. All my kids did it. And the only way we were able to stop it was to bite them back. I think they don't realize how much it HURTS until it's done to them. You can't let the kid bite him back, it has to be mom or dad. And obviously not hard enough to leave marks. But it worked on all of mine.

I know alot of people don't like that idea, and it was a last resort for us. But it truly truly worked. The very first time.

Mamaebeth said...

JD wasn't really a biter but i'll put in my 2 cents.

is he teething? teething causes all woes. :) i say this semi-seriously. the only time we had bite reports at school was when he was teething. ibuprofin is my friend.

also, there's a lot going on at 18 months... is he teething? is he learning a new skill? is it a communication issue? if he isn't really talking yet and they don't do baby sign i would suggest that. it maybe something he will grow out of.

from a discpline perspective, if you give a time out for biting and a timeout for throwing food on the floor (random examples) there really isn't a difference in the discipline level. but biting is much worse than throwing food on the floor. i think discipling differently from the norm for biting will make more of an impression.

but honestly, from what i have read, some kids are just biters. i am neutral on stac's suggestion. i am not sure i wouldn't try it if i had a biter.

Miss-buggy said...

well I have a biter. I can tell you that for ME the biting back didn't work. Sure it hurt him but then he would do it again the next day. I am not sure what to do either.
I usually find that he is hungry or tired when this happens. Can they offer the child a snack? That helps my son. Or if it is nap time and I know he is tired he will go down earlier.
Wish there was an easy answer but from my experience there really isn't

Frog said...

It's my son that's the vampire. When I dropped him off this morning they said he seemed to do better with the pacifer. I HATE using it all day again, but I don't have a choice right now... They will probably use it the rest of the summer and then in Sept try again without it.

They did say he seems to be tired and that's when it usually happens. He isn't provocted (sp?) either. He'll just reach out and bite.

This morning he bite me while I was brushing his teeth. He does this all the time. Well, I bite him back. Not hard and it didn't leave a mark, but I thought at this point I'll give it a try. A LOT of people say this works. I guess we'll wait and see.

I'll keep every you updated... If anyone else has anything else, please let me know!

Lacey Tackett said...

My 4 year old is about to go to Head Start, and has recently started to bite. I dunno why and I have no clue how to stop him.My FIL called him a bad boy and he hasn't bitten in 2 days so far.