Bodily Fluids | Giftie Etcetera: Bodily Fluids

Monday, October 13, 2008

Bodily Fluids

It's 1:30 p.m. So far, I've spilled breast milk all over my shirt and pants - twice. I've been pooped ALL OVER once. And I've been bled on twice. Awe...some.


So much for catching up with the laundry this weekend, eh?

Loki went to the doctor again to be weighed, since he wasn't gaining weight before. He is finally above his birth weight, three weeks later. Yippee. No more weight checks, though his next office visit is next week because it's his one month check-up. Sigh. It was one day too early for today to count as his one month. Fab-u-lous.

Loki has, you guessed it, breastmilk jaundice. You would know that I would choose to breastfeed and the little sucker would get one of the really rare complications of breastmilk, right? Basically, something like 2% of breastfed babies suffer for this (nonthreatening) jaundice. The only real problem is that it can mask real jaundice, which he did have, so they had to vampire his heel again today. Fortunately, my doctor is not concerned. She just said to keep feeding on demand during the day and up to every four hours at night. She said with the weight gain and with the whites of his eyes still white, we are okay if he looks a little like a pumpkin.

Oh, and Loki refused to nurse, three hours after last eating, in the quiet little corner of the doctor waiting area where I had total privacy and Ander had a sucker to keep him occupied. No, no, no. Because life cannot be simple.

An hour later, Loki DEMANDED FOOD NOW. At Highland Coffees. Packed for midterms. In front of my old history professor and some uncomfortable looking (but polite) freshman studying for midtems. Right as Ander announced, really loudly, "I made poo poo." (Might I add there was no need for an announcement. Really, you just had to say, breathe, and you could tell. Unless you were Doris (sans a sense of smell), anyway.) Have I mentioned that I carry an emergency bottle? No? That would be because I forgot to carry one. Ow.



Stac Cole said...

Maybe you should seriously consider writing a book. Maybe call it, "Forget all the other shit you read, this is parenting FOR REAL." You know why? HI-LA-RI-OUS. Sorry. But it really is :)

Derwinicus said...

When it rains it pours! It always seems to happen all at once. I don't know how Loki is, but when Aidan wants to eat, it is NOW and he screams his head off like he's been tortured until he gets boobie.

And I agree with Stac Cole - your book would be so funny! I'd definitely buy it.

Giftie Etcetera said...

Stac has to say that, because she's my cousin. But you, Dana, aren't even related to me. {blushes}

Rochelle said...

Oh my! You sure have some sort of awkward experience abilities! I do not envy that one at all! At least you have the humor to deal with it! I do not think a more serious individual could have walked away from such an experience with dignity left!