Thursday, July 31, 2008

Crashing

I am so tired!!!

It's 12:45 p.m., and I have to work here (a coffee shop) until 2:10 p.m., then go to an appointment across the street. I'm wiped out. I may even have a caffeinated drink, because I might have to. Seriously, I feel like I've been drugged. After the meeting, I can rest at my mom's (15 minutes away). But this sucks. There is no reason I should feel like I'm still in my first trimester. :(

Tomorrow is August 1.

As in August...September...

October!

I'm due in October. I'll be lucky to get past September. October is really soon.

I may panic.

Etcetera.

Mortgages

What kind of mortgage do you have? We just have one straight-up fixed rate mortgage. We pay about $100 more than our monthly note, so that we can build up equity. For those who have visited, our house is small but comfortable for a family of three. For our soon-to-be family of four, it would be a good size except for the lack of storage space.

But when we first got the mortgage, we only were able to put down 10%. So we had a variable-rate loan for the rest of the 20% down payment. We paid it off quickly, in less than a year, I think, but had much longer to pay it off.

Also, we were approved for about $10,000 more than we qualified for. The thing is, we have high outstanding debt (almost exclusively in the form of student loans that we are paying over thirty years). So banks limit the cap on borrowing based on that. And, since my business hadn't been open for 3 years, the bank would not consider my income. Nonetheless, they upped our approval based on the fact that the local bank where I applied knew I was a practicing lawyer in town and our credit scores were almost perfect. (Alan's, I believe, was right at 800! Mine was close.)

What if we hadn't of paid off that extra loan? Would we be screwed now? Would we be part of the mortgage crisis? Especially considering my illnesses, pregnancy, and the slow demand for lawyers at the beginning of the year, would we have had to move out of our home?

We worked hard to pay off that first mortgage, but as the bank easily approved us, I just figured we were okay with that loan. Now that I'm a curator (attorney for a missing person) on several defaulted mortgage suits, I know that the bank is not the best judge of whether you can pay. That could have been us!

Etcetera.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Toddler or Vampire?

Loyal readers, a friend needs help. I won't name her, to protect her innocent little 1 1/2 year old vampire, but she might comment and reveal herself anyway. ;) It's just that I know a lot of my loyal readers are parents and they might have some ideas for her.

Her little one keeps biting at school. The school seems to be reacting appropriately. They are watching him very closely, immediately telling him no and giving him a very brief timeout, and staying in close contact with my friend. They are giving the "victims" lots of positive attention. They've talked to my friend about getting him something for his mouth (a paci or sippy cup or something) for school. (Everyone acknowledges that this is a regression, but they are trying to respond to his need to chew and save vunerable human flesh, so it might be worth it.) My friend is putting him to bed earlier (to make sure he is well-rested), punishing him constant with the school's policy when he uses violence at home (stern no biting/hitting, brief timeout), and doing role-play of being nice to friends. She is also working on assisting him with his communication skills.

This little one is sweet and wonderful. He truly is. Ander plays well with him. He's not a mean kid. He just bites and slaps.

I figured someone, out of all my loyal readers, has the solution. So I'm putting it out there. Any ideas (crazy, controversial, untested) are welcome.

Etcetera.

Trying To Reduce Hours

I have a client meeting this morning. In a nod to my need to reduce my hours a bit and take it easier over the next ten weeks, I'll go to the meeting, do a bit of essential stuff at my office, and then come home for lunch. Ander usually takes an awesome nap, so I should be able to work from home for a solid stretch this afternoon. Tomorrow my appointment is in LaPlace in the afternoon, so I'll have to work a fairly full day tomorrow. That means that I have to reduce today if I'm reducing. But at least tomorrow, though long, is an easier day. I have a routine meeting and can work from a coffee shop, which is always relaxing.

Plus, since my fetal fibrowhatever test came back negative (yippee!), I'm likely not going into labor soon. Nonetheless, I am crashing as the evening approaches and clearly need to rest more, labor or not.

Etcetera.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Well...At Least There's An Upside

I saw my OB today.

The good news first. The baby is doing great. Strong heartbeat. Lying mostly head down. Oh, and I don't have to go on hospital bedrest...

...yet.

Sigh.

I started contracting hard last night. It would stall or stop upon rest, and then start again if I stood up. I saw the doctor this morning. They did an ultrasound (where the woman asked me if I had ever had a vaginal ultrasound before...silly lady...that wand has seen more action this pregnancy :/...). My cervix is closed, long, and not funneling from the top. Excellent news. They did a fetal fibrosomethingorother test. No results yet, but expected to be negative when the cervix isn't funneling. But...'cause, yah, there has to be a but...I'm dilated one fingertip. And I'm high risk because Ander was preterm.

So, assuming the fetal test comes out negative, I am to "take it really easy." I can work, but less. And from home more. I can make lunch for Ander and I, but not do housework or cooking if someone else can do it. (Poor Alan, who is already doing practically everything.) I'm supposed to sit instead of stand and lie down instead of sit. If the test is positive, of course, we'll revisit how much bedrest I need, but since the top of my cervix is long and closed, the doctor said he won't actually put me in the hospital. He'd probably just change my shots to a different drug and do heavier (but still not full) bedrest.

As far as the headaches and sudden, massive weight gain (about 9 pounds in 3 weeks, despite a gestational diabetes diet), he thinks my blood volumes are going up. I'm not swollen (the weight gain seems all in my tummy) and my blood pressure is fine, so it's likely not preeclampsia. He offered narcotics for the headaches, but admitted that they are really just to help me sleep and might not touch the pain. So I refused. But he did say no driving when I have the headaches. Basically, the very thing that is likely causing the headaches (high blood volume - the same thing that caused my low heart rate after Ander's delivery)can cause my sleepiness (which is extreme right now) and passing out. So headache means don't drive for awhile until it's totally gone, like the next day.

Basically, I'm supposed to take it easy all the time. I suck at that. Right now, I need a nap, bad, but I'm too stressed to sleep. And I haven't touched a bit of work yet today.

I'm only 29 1/2 weeks, so if the fetal test comes back positive, I think I'll ask for steroid shots for the babies lungs when the window for those opens.

In the meantime, I guess I'll just close my legs really tight.

Etcetera.

Nights Away

I know lots of other parents whose kids have never let their kid spend the night somewhere else and probably won't until they are school-age. Not Ander. He probably slept at his aunt's house for the first time at about 10 months old. He still sleeps at one of the aunts' house or my mom's house on a fairly regular basis. Maybe once a month?

One or twice, he cried during the night for us. Only once was it a ton, and I can't remember why he was there, but it was some sort of medical reason and they couldn't call me to come get him, so they dealt with it. Now, he gets excited to stay with Aunt Jen or Aunt Wen. He thinks it's pretty cool.

Last night, he stayed at Jen's house. I had a client appointment near my house at 6:30 p.m. Alan had to cut the grass (way overgrown) and we needed to grocery shop. This morning, I had a doctor's appointment that I could take Ander to, but I really didn't enjoy the thought. And he read (actually, listened to) 25 books for the library this summer, so he was invited to the Book Party today, and his Aunt Wen wanted to take him. All in all, it seemed like a good night to crash at Aunt Jen's. (Aunt Wen's hubby had his tonsils out yesterday, so Aunt Jen it was.)

There's a major upside. When I go into labor, Ander will likely just think it's a normal night at the aunt's house.

Etcetera.

Monday, July 28, 2008

My Child

I would not say my child was AWFUL on Saturday, when four other kids ranging from age 18 months to 9 years visited our house and played with his toys. Fortunately, all the kids were well-behaved and all the parents attentive. But my child was, well, the worse behaved, comparatively. (He stilled got complements from Doris for being willing to share his toys, which was nice, since I was too stressed to give any of the positive reinforcement that I should have given.)

Two problems emerged. One was that, if he saw another kid playing with a toy that he knew was his, he YANKED it out of the kid's hand. Wow. Of course, the visitor got the toy back and Ander got a warning, and on the second offense, a timeout. But he never really understood that no one was taking his toys home. And he used to like to share and take turns. So this was not an encouraging turn of events. My well-meaning friends would offer that Ander could have his toy and their kid could play with something else, but I just couldn't go along with that, as he really was yanking toys from others and being quite mean about it. I'm trying to teach him that if he wants a toy, he can nicely ask for it (which sometimes works, especially if he offers the other kid another toy), but WHOOSH...flies right over his head.

The other problem? TALKING BACK. YELLING, SCREAMING FITS OF BACKTALK. Unfortunately, that did not go away when the other kids left. And, sadly, he didn't learn it from any of them. If anything, he might have taught them how to talk back. So new rule. You can say, "I am mad." You can say, "I don't want to." You can cry and go off by yourself. But you have to be nice. No screaming, hitting, kicking, or attempting to hurt mommy and daddy when they correct you. It's so hard to draw the line between letting him be frustrated and not letting him be mean. It's a surprisingly thin line.

My friends Un and Doris both commented on how calm I am when I correct Ander. Considering that inside, my blood pressure was soaring and I was out-of-control and about to lose it, I was really happy to hear that I appeared calm when disciplining. That takes a lot of work for me, even though I believe calm and control on my part is really important.

And hubby, who probably has much more tolerance for backtalk and screaming than I do, has still been willing to help discipline Ander when he crosses Mommy's tolerance threshold, which I truly appreciate.

Etcetera.

Overwhelmed

I've had a headache for two days now. Yesterday, I blamed it on the sun. Tylenol sort of touches it, but barely. I've also been incredibly sleepy. I am sitting up on the couch, reading a book, and I wake up when I hear the book hit the floor. I'm driving, and decide I need to pull over, or I might crash. I probably napped 5 hours yesterday, and still slept 8 hours (minus peeing in the middle of the night time) last night. Also, I'm peeing every half hour now. Love lee. :(

So Alan sent me an e-mail about preeclampsia. Ni ice. Anyhoo, I'm not swelling and haven't gained a pound this week (despite PIGGING out on Saturday...OINK OINK). And I see my doctor tomorrow. I suspect this is just normal old pregnancy stuff. But who knows?

I'm busting butt at work. Tonight (yep, tonight) I have a client appointment. I have three new clients coming in this week or next. It's crazy. Unfortunately, along with the billable work (great), I'm doing Rachel's job (not so great). Between that and falling asleep AT MY DESK, work is crazy. She comes back on September 2. I miss her. :(

At home, we need to redo the area behind the shed, fix the hole in Ander's ceiling, paint my bedroom ceiling, paint the baby's room, and set up the baby's room. We haven't bought a single thing for the baby that we need (um...carseat - a must, sling, double stroller, bottles, diapers...we especially need to buy the carseat and dipes). I haven't packed my bag. I'm 29 weeks. Ander arrived at 34 weeks. This upcoming weekend is (over)booked, with an event at a friend's house in St. Franscisville on Saturday, a baby shower on Sunday, and getting together with other friend's in New Orleans Sunday afternoon.

Next weekend, I have a luncheon on Friday, family reunion (sort of) on Saturday, and a Christening (I'm the Godmother!) on Sunday.

The next weekend, MIL is visiting. She plans to take us shopping at Babies 'R Us. Hopefully, I'll get above-mentioned carseat.

It goes on and on. Events every second of everyday. Some I really am looking forward to, particularly the ones with friends, but some are just exhausting to think about but I have to be there.

I goes I shouldn't complain too much, as I found time in the past two weeks to read all the Harry Potter books again. It's becoming a July tradition. Hey, who wants to babysit an adorable two year old and a brand new infant boy in November while hubby and I go to the movies? ;)

Etcetera.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Love Old Friends

Un was in town with her family yesterday. Doris and her family also came over for supper. It was a blast! We started out at Louie's. They mopped the floor while we were there. Alan was shocked to find out that they mop the floor. He he!

We tried LSU, but the tiger was sleeping, the Indian Mounds were being redone, and the sun was hot. Add potty-training kids and a total lack of convenient bathrooms, and that didn't last long. (Someone - name omitted to protect the innocent - peed behind the tiger cage. :) Since he was too young to be arrested, we figured it was pretty safe. Plus, you know that you personally know at least one person whose done it and was not too young to be arrested. LOL.)

Then we went to the State Capitol. Ander was all like, la de da...I do this all the time because my daddy works here...but everyone still had a great time. It was air-conditioned and the guards seemed to like the kids. Un's husband pulled about ten things out of his pockets while going through security - a cell phone, an extra cell for the kid to play games on, keys...it was pretty funny. Then he walked through security, set up the alarm, and had to pull more stuff out of his pocket. :) Alan walked through without taking anything out of his pocket. The guard started to say something, Alan flashed his badge, and the guard said, "oh, sorry, sir...go on." Alan felt important. LOL again.

For supper, we ordered pizza, calzones, salads, and spinach artichoke dip. Yummy! The kids (five in all) had a raging time throwing plastic balls all over the bedroom while the grownups sat around talking and pretending the chaos in the bedroom wasn't happening.

I'm paying today. My head hurts, my body aches, and I am so tired. But it was worth it!

Etcetera.

Six Quirks Meme

Mathochist tagged me for the Six Quirks Meme.

The Rules:

Link the person(s) who tagged me


Mention the rules on my blog


Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of mine


Tag 6 fellow bloggers by linking them


Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged

My Quirks:


I rarely listen to the radio while driving, and if I do listen, it's to talk radio only.

I like to clean grime out of the part connecting two tiles with a toothpick. It gives me a sense of real satisfaction.

I dip my pizza in balsamic vinegar before eating it.

I like my own handwriting, especially in a pretty blue non-gel ink, so even though I don't have much opportunity to write things by hand these days, I doodle words on yellow legal pads everyday...just to see my own handwriting. {blushing}

I hate movies. Going to the movie theater feels like going to the dentist most of the time.

Except for mascara, I don't even own eye makeup. Nonetheless, I have soem natural brown coloring on my eyelids (despite an otherwise lily white face). Sometimes, people tell me I am wearing too much eye shadow. (Hmmm...perhaps I should use a lighter shadow to lighten it?)


I'm tagging

Alan


Brien


Dana and Derwin


Krumply


Paca


Misty Bug

Will those tagged please put links to their own blogs in the comments below? (I suck at links and have a headache...and clearly am just plan lazy.)

Etcetera.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

I'm the Mommy

Alan and I knew long before we reproduced that he has incredible mommy qualities and I have strong daddy tendencies. (Nope, I didn't mix that up. But if you know me, you know that.) Alan is affectionate (though, let me reiterate to him personally, MORE affectionate would be better), nuturing, and patient. I'm a risk-taker, a leader, and in favor of children helping themselves.

Everyone said, during my first pregnancy, that you change completely when you become a parent. Nope. I became more - of myself. I became more outspoken, because you have to be when someone tries to smoke near your child. I became more of a leader. After all, I have a built-in follower. He has no choice. Mawhaw!

However, Ander doesn't seem to notice that Alan is more mommy-like and I am more dady-like. For some strange reason, if he's sick, he cuddles with me. Even if Alan begs him to cuddle with daddy. He asks Daddy to take him outside, even though Alan and Ander hate the sun and Mommy loves the outside. If mommy drives when both parents are in the car, Ander will comment. Ander, who can't possibly know that mommies are more likely, in most households, to change a diaper...and whose daddy changes his diaper/gives him a bath/feeds him supper every night...still looks to mommy first for those things.

Shrug. I don't claim to understand the two year old brain.

But I love the bonus cuddles.

Etcetera.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

It's All About Perspective

I write on several message boards quite regularly. One in particular (that I know some of my loyal readers also participate in) has people that I know in real life and people that I don't know, but who know people that I know in real life. In other words, these aren't random strangers that I am talking to. I had real life relationships with some of the posters long before the message board existed.

Lately, many of us on the board have gotten pregnant. As one might expect, pregnancy and childbirth is a frequent topic of discussion on this particular (non-pregnancy related) message board. I participate somewhat in the discussions. I would not say I'm a driving force, but I am excited about having a baby, stressed about my GD diet and my shots and my constant doctors' appointments and scares during this pregnancy, and coping (still) with my miscarriage. Pregnancy is clearly an important part of my life, and pretending that it isn't with these people (or my loyal readers, for that matter) would be a lie.

One member of the board is struggling with infertility and pregnancy lost. Been there, done that, obviously. So I absolutely sympathize. And I'm writing about this here, and not there, so as to not cause her more distress.

But she has asked that we talk about pregnancy less because it is "insensitive" to talk about when people have experienced lost.

Hmm.

I'm not quite sure what I think about that. Having experienced loss, I am very careful to never ask people if they are "trying." If a friend reveals they are trying, I wish them luck, let them know I'm there if they need me, and let them come to me if they need support. If a friend who is struggling with infertility or miscarriage cannot stand to attend my baby shower (not that I'm having one, as this is not my first baby, but as an example :)) or visit for a while when I have a newborn, I understand and it's totally okay. And if this lady chooses not to read the pregnancy posts, that's okay, too.

But it's not insensitive to talk about my pregnancy, is it? It's not like I'm chanting, "I'm pregnant and you're not." Not at all. I still think this pregnancy sticking, after weeks of bleeding, and this baby surviving, after my nurse told me to come in immediately in case I wanted to terminate, is a MIRACLE. But talking about it, posting about it, trying my best to enjoy it even as I secretly still haven't decided that I'll actually have a baby come October...those things are helping me cope with my own lost.

I NEED to celebrate this baby. I can't grieve forever. I can't make this baby's life less significant and important because sometimes, babies die. This baby is important.

I am so sorry for her pain. I certainly don't ever want to cause pain, especially pain like what I felt when I lost my baby. And I cried over many a pregnancy announcement after my miscarriage. It seemed like everyone but me was having a baby. But I didn't ever cry over THIER BABIES; I cried over my loss. I know I could not have attended a baby shower last December. I know I didn't want to talk about it. But I never, for a second, wished that anyone else would not celebrate their own precious new little lives.

I hate to hurt her, but I need to celebrate Baby Box the Sequel.

Etcetera.

Our Kio Is Fixed

Alan can drive himself to work. Yippee!!! No more morning and afternoon trips to the State Capitol. Perhaps I can actually get my work done today. Whew!

Oh, and bonus, the problem was completely covered by warrantee.

For the last four nights, I've dreamed about delivery. I'm still a while away. I don't remember dreaming about delivery this much with Ander. And why must I dream about an unmedicated delivery? I need my epidural. Anyway, my baby has been born five times in the last four days, at least in my mind. Is it October yet?

Etcetera.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

So Scary

One of the assistant district attorneys from my area and his wife were walking down the street, when a habitual criminal shot the wife. She is expected to survive, but it really scared me.

I don't know this particular ADA. But I know most of them, and for the most part, they strike me as fair and reasonable people. But if his family was attacked because he did his job...that is terrifying. I currently have only one felon client, but I am still shaken up.

Etcetera.

I Hate You!

Ander's learned to talk back. Not just a little lip, but full on screaming "I hate you" and "you cannot" at me and hubby. Yesterday, I actually praised him when he said, "I am angry" and cried. Because, well, at least that is a more appropriate reaction.

We've been ignoring the behavior, on the theory that it's just something he picked up from his older cousins and it would go away without attention, but it's getting worse. So timeout it is. It'll be quite a challenge to calmly warn and then put him in timeout while he's yelling at me.

Can a two year old understand "disrespectful"?

Etcetera.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

For the Gifties and Those Who Love Gifties

It's been requested that I publish the following post from LSMSA and ask all of you to "save the date"! Road trip, maybe? ;)

Our inaugural social/service weekend was such a success that we are eagerly planning for next year. Save the date of July 17-19, 2009. Our next event will be open to alumni bringing their children. Children aged 13 and older will be included in age-appropriate tasks. Younger children will enjoy parental co-op babysitting. We are hoping to have a cooking team, a babysitting team, an outdoor tasks team, and three teams to split the interior projects of cleaning, minor repairs, and painting. Please contact LSMSAAA Natchitoches liaison Catherine Credeur (’89) at catherinecredeur@hotmail.com if you would like to head a team. All alumni are encouraged to plan to participate. More details will be coming in the spring.

Social/service is meant to be a blend of alumni from all classes and our families. It is a particularly good opportunity for the gifties who are in still in school or who contribute meaningfully through non-profit sector jobs. (In other words, the perpetually broke gifties who still love our school and want to give something back. No fat checkbooks required to come to participate in social/service weekend.) For the alums hoping to start a giftie legacy with your kids, this is a great opportunity to expose your future gifties to the "living/learning environment".

I think everyone who participated in the 2008 event (14 alums + 1 husband, spanning classes 1986-2004) will say we had a great time together. We accomplished a lot to improve the appearance and cleanliness of Caddo. We also had a great time sharing our giftie bond over Dixon's jambalaya pot.

I would like to start organizing our team leaders ASAP. If you want to volunteer as a team member, the official sign-up will begin in the spring. In the meantime, save the date; gather your suite/hall mates/BFF and local lunch bunch members; and get ready.


-quoted from a fellow alum

Etcetera.

At The Eye Doctor

Yep, my eye is still the size of Texas. But it doesn't hurt quite as much, so that is something.

A young doctor saw me first before the experienced doctor came in to take another look. The entire trip, from calling for appointment to the end, was three hours. Two of those were in the office. This place treats kids, so I'm not sure why they were so bad with Ander, except that maybe they rarely treat toddlers? I usually get a sitter, but I didn't know about the appointment until the last minute, and they needed me there right away to fit me in. There was no time to bring Ander anywhere but with me.

They did everything wrong. (Not regarding the eye care, which seemed fine. But regarding the toddler.)

First, we walked into the exam room. (Well, "first" is an exaggeration. First, we sat in the waiting area for an hour, even though I was right across the street at Woman's Hospital and they could have had me arrive at 9:45 a.m. Oh, and we changed a dirty diaper in yet another bathroom with no changing table and no counter space. Again, kids are some of their patients, so I thought this very unsanitary.) The young doctor told me to sit in the exam chair and turned to Ander and said, as if he was ten, please sit there, pointing to a chair in the corner where Ander couldn't even see me because he was blocked by the doctor. I politely (or not so politely, depending on your perspective) ignored the doctor, moved Ander's chair to a better spot, gave him his magna doodle, and reminded him that the doctor had to look at mommy's eyes and he needed to sit and play under the doctor was done.

At one point, Ander stood up. He did not move away from the area or anything; I suspect he was repositioning his magna doodle. The young doctor said sharply (to me - with a blinder over one eye and my head pushed back by the machines, so that I could do nothing), "he needs to not touch the equipment. It's expensive." Then, he told Ander, "stop touching the equipment." (Ander was nowhere near the equipment.) Finally, he added, "I told some little boy last week not to touch and he did anyway. Kids just don't listen."

Yah, I was fuming by now. I have no problem with Ander not touching the equipment. I had been clear at the beginning with Ander that he had to stay in the chair. I didn't exactly give the impressive that Ander could run around and do anything he wanted. So why punish us for the last little boy's antics?

So I got out of the chair (after all, if the machinery was so important to protect, the doctor could wait a second to examine me). I put Ander back on the chair and warned him to stay on the chair for a little bit longer or there would be a timeout. Ander was stressed by now, because evil doctor had spoke so harshly to him about something Ander wasn't doing and could not change, and he refused and got off the chair.

So I calmly said, "timeout." I placed him in the corner. "You are in timeout for two mintues because you did not obey mommy and got off the chair."

I go back to my exam. And the assistant/nurse walks up to Ander, and tries to GIVE HIM HIS MAGNA DOODLE. "He's in timeout. He can have it afterwards."

The doctor (idiot) says, "wow, you didn't slap him. You were really calm. Most of our patients practically beat their kids. You think your way will work?"

Seriously.

It went on and on. Instead of letting us wait for another half an hour in the big room with the tv, I guess they had to protect the other patients, so Ander and I got a tiny spot in the hallway. When Ander got in the way of passing staff, they looked annoyed. Well, screw 'em. I was annoyed to be clearly stuck in a different waiting area than everyone else seeing the same doctor. Ander pooped, again.

All this time, I'm the only person in the room who looks beat up. Sigh.

I wanted to beat somebody up myself.

We got through the next eye doctor's visit by bribing with gum. And we hauled butt out of there.

I understand not everyone is comfortable with children. I understand not everyone likes children. But people have to see doctors and children are part of people's lives. I am very considerate. Ander is not allowed to annoy anyone, pushing his behavior abilities to their very limits. Whenever possible, I get a sitter. (The lack of drop-in daycares, however, do make that very, very difficult, even though I am willing to pay for care.) The bottom line is that we were amazingly well-behaved (apparently, both of us, as I don't beat my child), yet we were treated like terrors.

Etcetera.

Monday, July 21, 2008

What A Day!

I was feeling crappy all weekend. I have the never-ending sniffles. A chronic headache. I had a fight with Alan - not a big one, but that drains me. But the worse thing is that my left eye and the left side of my face is SWOLLEN! It hurts. I guess the infection is back. Also, we went to a birthday party last night. I was exhausted and hot and came home and noticed that the baby was not kicking much. I freaked. This morning, he still barely kicked. I think he kicked once - just enough to know he was still alive, but not enough to be normal. It was clear that I would have to see the OB and the eye doctor this morning.

The problems? Well, first, I need to work. I took Thursday and Friday off, feeling like crap. Alan was sick two days last week, too, and he is practically alone in the office this week, meaning he cannot call in sick to anyone or get vacation approved. Then, there's our new vehicle. The fuel pump is already freakin' out. And it's on back order. So I had to drop Alan off at work, bring Ander with me to the OB and eye doctor (if I could get emergency appointments), go to work, and then come back to town to pick up Alan at the end of the day. All feeling like someone punched my face, shoved cotton up my nose, and was wringing my forehead.

I did my best. Dropped off Alan. Went to OB. Of course, as we arrived, the baby started not just kicking, but rolling and dancing. No need to see the OB. Maybe the baby could just sense my tiredness and the infection in my system.

The eye doctor heard I was pregnant and saw me immediately. Well, three hours after I called and two hours after my appointment. But he saw me.

Turns out the infection has spread down my face. (No kidding? Is that why that side of my body hurts and I look like I've been in a barfight?)

Stronger antibiotics eyedrops five times a day, a possible follow-up in two weeks if things don't clear up, hot compresses five times a day...all added to my GD diet and my four finger pricks and two meds...sigh, when do I work?

Oh, wait, I can't see out of my left eye or think straight. Probably, I don't work.

Etcetera.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Starbucks

I don't care one lick that some many Starbucks stores are closing. After all, I really don't like Starbucks all that much. In Laplace or New Orleans, there's always PJs with it's delicious granita. Highland has the spectalular granita latte. And anywhere in Baton Rouge, there's a CCs, with it's perfect view.

I do feel for the employees. I tend to like them and hate to see them scrambling for jobs.

But what I don't understand is...even in Baton Rouge, where so few people go to Starbucks, they are only closing stores that aren't really close to other stores. I can still think of several places in town where two Starbucks will be right around the corner from each other. Strange.

Now, if they would just open a CCs near my house, the world would be so much better.

Etcetera.

A Watermelon On My Counter

There's a watermelon on my counter. It's really small. Maybe two servings. It grew in my uncle's garden. The watermelon is calling my name. "Kristy...kristy," it whispers.

My doctor says I can't have sugar. My dietician says watermelon is on the list of gestational diabetes no-nos, along with orange juice and milk.

My blood sugar fluctuates between the low end of the normal range and normal.

I've never failed (or taken) that silly "drink" test.

I've only had high sugars at MIL's house, after eating two hotcakes with syrup and an egg McGriddle.

I think I am having watermelon today.

Perhaps a whole entire watermelon.

Plus, I've been meaning to clean off my counter.

Etcetera.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Some Koolaid, Please

The lady on this blog said something I've wanted to say many times, but she said it better than I could. I usually link such things in my gutter under my current reading list, but since Alan tells me no one follows those links.

A Little Pregnant

Etcetera.

I Scored A 21

21

As a 1930s wife, I am
Very Poor (Failure)

Take the test!

Still To Do

Ander arrived just six weeks from now, relative to where I am at in this pregnancy. The baby's room is not done. The closets (needed for baby stuff) are not cleaned out. The kitchen and our bedroom is a wreck. I cannot find my brown shoes. (Who the heck loses an entire pair of shoes? Sigh.)

I'm on this stupid GD diet, and it means an extra hour or two of work a day, planning, and testing, and cooking, and shopping. It's expensive ('cause protein costs tons more than carbs).

And I have a head cold and am tired.

On the positive side (see how considerate I am, trying not to drag all of you down?), I had coffee with Doris last night! What a breathe of fresh air.

Etcetera.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Memory Tag (from mamaebeth)

Memory Tag!!

1. Add a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you. If you don't want to play on your blog, or if you don't have a blog, I'll leave my memory of you in my comments. I can't wait to see what people remember.
It'll be fun! I tag all of y'all!

Etcetera.

Home Sick

I really thought/hoped/prayed/wished/sacrificed-innocent-little-animals that I would skip out on Alan's cold. After all, he is really sick and downing Nyquil. I can down, well, Tylenol. He has no appetite. I must eat every three hours...and gross stuff, at that. Ander needs childcare and we are useless. (Fortunately, he's pretty self-sufficient. He's sitting in his booster seat, watching tv, and feeding himself yogurt. But NOT the "baby kind." Because, HOLY MOSES, he (shouted really loud) "WILL NOT EAT THE BABY KIND!" Ugh. Sigh. And can I go back to bed?

Last night, I started with a stuffy nose. A bit of sneezing. A mild cough.

Today, sore throat and crusty eyes.

And I'm having coffee with Doris tonight! Being sick is not an option.

Etcetera.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

All The Things That Suck About Losing Electricty

I took off early to spend time with Ander. During his nap, I was working. Diligently.

Pop. The electricity went off.

No ice. No cold water. No A/C. NO INTERNET!!! Limited time on my computer battery. No way to cook my preplanned, diabetic-approved snack.

Ugh. So now we are at CCs. Wonder how long the crayons and puzzle will keep Ande occupied?

Etcetera.

I Hate the GD Diet

Did I complain about the gestational diabetes yesterday? Well, here I go again. Get used to it, I guess.

Breakfast is simple enough. Whole wheat waffles and bacon. Snack - watermelon and cottage cheese. Lunch...hmmm...3 carbs (1 starch, 1 milk, 1 fruit), salad w/ cheese and bacon. The problem? Those 3 carbs. When you cannot eat "normal" carbs (like cookies :/), what do you eat? Snack - banana and pb. I'll be home in time for supper. Guess I'll go pack my suitcase full of food now.

Sigh.

Etcetera.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Gestational Diabetes

I see the nutritionist this afternoon.

Ander is well taken care of, as he is joining his Maw Maw, cousins, and favorite aunt and uncle (sorry, Sunny, but he said it not me) in Biloxi on a beach and bowling trip. He chatted about it the whole way there. He'll spend the night and I'll pick him up from my mom's house as usual tomorrow.

In the meantime, I have to deal with the GD. The weird thing is that my blood sugars soared at my MIL's house. But now that I'm home, they are either normal or drop. It doesn't seem to matter what I eat. It's pretty hard to justify not having orange juice, fruit, or milk while pregnant, if your blood sugars are stable. So I'm going to talk to the dietician. As my sugars get worse (and they probably will later in pregnancy), I will eat perfectly if that's what it takes to control them. But in the meantime, I refuse to cut out cereal and milk, fruit, and oj if it isn't really affecting the baby. I have mostly cut out the junk, like brownies and cupcakes, but that's good for me anyway.

Did I mention yet that the "big boy bed' was an instant and amazing success? My kid loves it! I should have done that ages ago.

Etcetera.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Trying Church

We were going to church very regularly when I was pregnant with Ander and after he was born. We did that for quite a while. Then we moved and St. George was quite a drive away. But we went anyway.

Somehow, between a child who could not sit still, a horrible cryroom, and the tension at our house of getting three of us ready for Mass on time, we quit going. Or we went, and had fights on the way. It was not peaceful. It was not productive.

Ander is older. He understands timeout perfectly. He can sit and look at a book for several minutes. He talks alot, but, well, God gave him that voice, right?

We are also trying the Catholic Church right by my house. Father Michael, a newish priest from who did his first year in Paulina, has moved there. Plus, it's in walking distance of my home (if there were sidewalks and trees and we had a half hour to get to church...but, really, not a bad walk).

I hope this goes well. I've always thought church should be a peaceful experience.

Etcetera.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Totally Fluent In English

"The screwedriver is under the couch. I'm so mad. You get it daddy. There's a spider under there! It's going to get your hand. Where's my screwdriver." -Ander

He just talks like a grown person at this point. Compared to some grown persons, he talks better. It freaks me out. It seems like yesterday, we were nervous because he wasn't talking enough.

Etcetera.

Friday, July 11, 2008

For Paca

I forget you can't see us. Here's a cuter me:



And Sammy Jankis and Ander:



Etcetera.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Copycats

Remember back when mamaebeth posted her eye swelling up. I'm such a copycat.












And my baby is copycatting off of his mommy...cause doesn't he look just like me? (Except for Daddy's frown, of course. ;))










Etcetera.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Swelling

On July 4, my right eye swoll so large that I ended up going to the pharmacy. (The emergency room in Leesville is NOT an option when I am pregnant. I do not trust them.) The pharmacist could do nothing, because I am pregnant, but suggested that I call my OB if it get worse. However, it only got better and, by Monday, the problem had gone away.

Yesterday, both eyes started to swell. My OB gave me drops and is sending me to an eye doctor. Today, I can barely see to type this. I really have to go to work, but I may have to work at home a bit so I can start seeing before I drive. :(

Etcetera.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

A Comedy of Errors

Seriously, can't I get my life together?

At the doctor's office today, I was officially diagnosed with gestational diabetes. The really bad news is that I have uncontrolled fasting blood sugars. Diet can help blood sugars, but not really fasting blood sugars. At some point in my pregnancy, I might need insulin. I also got a treat - some unexpected blood work. :( The good news is that I realized just how good the "expert" blood-drawer is compared to hubby when he gives shots. Oh, and my weight gain and blood pressure weren't bad, either. Of course, the baby is doing fine. And no worries about my right eye THAT IS SWOLLEN SHUT. Sigh. I got drops for that.

It took three pharmacies to get the eye drops. And the special pharmarcy that makes my shot medicine now expects to have a refill of it by Thursday. Sigh.

My sister and I went to Ninfa's for lunch. Despite a huge open sign, they are closed until 3 p.m. for construction. Luckily, my sister knew all the guys on the construction team, so they were able to tell us. So we went elsewhere, and ate unhealthy and way too costly, because my sister was running late by then for work and we had to stop where we could.

During lunch, I spilled meat pie all over my and my sister's legs and spilled my diet Sprite all over the table and her cell phone. She says I cannot blame my clumsiness on pregnancy...but dammit, it is because I'm pregnant. I'm not normally like that.

Etcetera.

Monday, July 7, 2008

A Long Day

It's not even 9:30 a.m. Let's review so far.

I'm getting dressed and watching Special Delivery on tv, when there's a mom who has twins, one dead and one alive. A little much for me on the due date from my miscarriage.

I'm driving to work, when a cop turns on his lights and Ander announces, "Mommy goes too fast." How does he know these things? I've never even been stopped for speeding before, but now I have my first ticket.

Then, I listen to my work voicemails. A client calls with a complaint that I misunderstood what she wanted and she doesn't want to pay her bill. She is very polite, but I really thought I understood exactly what she wanted. It's just a small bill, and I'll do what I can to make her happy, but it's not a good start to my day.

Did I mention that my stomach is all messed up? Or that I have juvenile court, which is generally very sad, until late this afternoon?

The day should be fabulous. Fabulous, I tell you.

Sigh.

Etcetera.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

The Food Sucks

Why is it that food in Leesville is like food in a foreign country? And why can't it happen to be like a foreign country with good fodd? :/

Seriously, even the McDonald's, while okay, has a different menu it. The menu includes biscuits with sausage gravy. I know I'm in the minority here (but not as much in the minority as when I thought the legisture should get pay raises), but I hate sausage and I hate sausage gravy. Most of all, I hate that, while I'm eating my hotcakes, MIL pours sausage gravy over her bisquits and eats them with a fork at 7 a.m. Gag. And I need six small meals (pregnant, blood sugar issues during pregnancy, diagnosed issues with my digestive system, and not crashing after a meal...I mean NEED) instead of two HUGE ones.

The Chinese place, for lunch, has reasonable food. The problem? Since no one eats there, the buffet isn't that fresh. (It's buffet only.) Also, the real Chinese food stuff, like meats and veggies with gravy, is sparse. There's a lot of chicken nuggets and warmed up fries. Ick.

Supper at Ryan's was the worse. Cold steak, no Sprite, baked potatoes only at the end of the meal and far undercooked, dressings all creamy with no vinegar selection, no fried chicken until dessert time, lots of overcooked, yucky, nonseasoned vegetables. Blah!

Cooking at home isn't much better. There's margarine instead of butter. Cheese looks fine, but the bag reveals it is past its expiration date. The water has a yellowish hue and the fridge is stuffed with off-brand Dr. Pepper and no bottled water or Sprite (pregnant girl talking here, obviously). Oreo cookies are...gasp...white and not chocolate. There's tons of fruit, but most of it involves peaches or cantaloup (both gag-inducing at this stage of pregnancy). I see a watermelon. There's talk of watermelon. There are promises of watermelon. The watermelon is NEVER actually cut. :( The bread is all white bread (while I'm a whole wheat kind of girl). It's not that I can't eat here. It's just that I'm starving (again, growing baby in tummy), slightly nauseous (tummy full of baby), and want food that is my type of food. I am not looking forward to lunch. It's just roast beef, right? But there's no po-boy bread for a sandwich (which would be perfect, with the garden fresh tomatoes on the counter that MIL...holy cow...wants to refrigerate and slice 'em all up...seriously, it's tomatoe torture...eat teh darn things instead...they are great with just salt and pepper). The sides, as always, will be mashed potatoes (she won't make enough) and corn (bland, from a can). There won't be a good gravy (though she knows how to make one, she won't bother). The food won't be ready at lunch time (because they all like to skip breakfast, eat later, and then gorge themselves). I'll be starving, and even though I'll grab breakfast at McDs, again, my blood sugar will crash and then soar.

For supper, she'll serve leftovers of the lunch that I didn't enjoy. And when I make myself something else, or grab a pizza or a salad, she'll roll her eyes and talk about how picky other people (because she won't dare criticize me one more time, since I threatened to take her out for some fresh sushi if she mentions cantaloup ONE MORE F'ING TIME) are about food.

I need my frozen waffles with butter, lite syrup, and center cut bacon. I need a pB&j (creamy, not crunchy...one wheat...with blackberry preserves). I need a huge salad, with lettuce that isn't white and tomatoes that are diced not sliced, and real balsamic vinegar. {insert sobbing tears of a hungry, pregnant lady here}

Or, really, I'd do with a cup of cafe' au lait and a flaky croissant, but c'est la vie.

Etcetera.

Friday, July 4, 2008

4:23 a.m.

Ugh. I am wide awake. I slept okay last night. I brought my own pillow and was asleep by 10:30 p.m. But the bed is hard and a double (not a queen) and my leg hurts and my eye hurts. My leg swoll up a bit on the ride here and I'm still suffering from it. My eye has a sty in it. I'm thirsty, but MIL only has huge jugs of water, so I need to get some bottles of water if I want to keep something in my room overnight. (Something about certain water systems makes me ill. I suspect it's something the water is treated with, since even eating food cooked in quite a bit of water in certain areas gives me stomach issues.)

Ander is still sleeping great in the other room, in a really big boy bed. It's a double with a lot of height, but he seems very happy there. In fact, when we finally put him to bed at 10 p.m. (after giving him a few minutes after the ride to visit with Grandma), he keep saying, "I not go night night." All the while, he was climbing into bed and falling asleep. ;)

Did I mention I could really do for some bacon. Oh, and waffles. And OJ. And raisin toast. Hmm...and some...

Etcetera.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Killing Time

I have an hour before my meeting. I only brought a certain amount of work with me because I wanted to remember the stuff I'm bringing to deal with at MILs and because I only had about 2 nonmeeting hours of work today. But now I'm done with what I brought and have time left to waste.

I did go to Wal-mart to pick up a couple of things. One is pre-measured servings of Benadryl. My son is so allergic to bugs! He swells up like crazy. So I'm putting some premeasures in my purse and giving my mom some, just in case. The other is a Magna Doodle, for the drive tonight. I hope he likes it. He's been writing i and o a lot, and we are working on m and a and s.

I wonder what the four hours in the car tonight will do to my ankles? And I wonder what sleeping in a strange bed, when I already cannot sleep because of aches and pains and MASSIVE stomach will do to my disposition? Plus, food in Leesville SUCKS, and I'm into eating right now, but having a bit of an overstuffed pregnancy feelings, meaning I have to eat often, but not too much at a time. MIL eat two huge meals a day, and for some unknown reason, my constant eating seems to disturb her. I should be fun. :(

My BIL ONCE AGAIN expressed his concern that about me not going into another room when breastfeeding. Seriously, I am squeamish enough about breastfeeding without having him on my case. I plan to be very discreet. No one will be seeing my girl stuff (a bit for their sake, because I think being discrete is courteous, but mostly for my sake, as I am quite prudish)...except that I might not be as discrete around him, 'cause he is seriously p'ing me off! (Stac Cole, if you are wondering, it's not Tim. But you already knew that, right? ;))

Etcetera.

Drives Me Crazy

On the way to Laplace, on Airline Highway, there are electronic road signs that say things like, "Slow Down" and "One Road Highway Ahead" and "Reduced Speed Limit Ahead." The problem? All untrue. There is no construction or one road roadway and these signs have been up forever. Our tax dollars are probably paying for that. Sigh. Plus, people are learning to ignore the false information. But what happens when/if the information becomes true. Wolf, wolf.

Etcetera.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Heaven

My mom babysits a wonderfully sweet little girl who is just a bit older than Ander. A few weeks ago, her grandpa died suddenly.

Well, this morning, I told the little girl it was my mom's birthday, and that my mom is OLD. And the little girl responded, "when I'm old, I'm going to go to heaven."

Awwww.

Etcetera.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Packing Toys

For a trip to MILs, how much toys shoudl we pack. On one hand, we want to bring some familiar stuff. On the other, MIL always has things Ander can play with, and we don't want to bring our whole house.

For sure, I'll pack a bag of toys for the car and hopefully remember to charge the dvd player.

Etcetera.