Sleeping Through the Night | Giftie Etcetera: Sleeping Through the Night

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Sleeping Through the Night

I'm not a fan of letting a baby cry it out. Honestly, I don't know if I could let Loki cry until he falls asleep. I have no problem with a bit of fussing, as I believe having to wait a minute teaches a child to deal and have patience, but full on crying - we don't do it. (Well, we do, with Ander. But Ander is old enough to understand that we love him but won't give in to his fits.)

That said, I HAVE to do something. Loki is keeping me up all night. He screams and cries, at random, even when we are co-sleeping. Some nights, he nurses a lot. Others, he refuses to nurse at all.

I am so sleepy, even with Alan doing the crib runs (getting him from the crib when Loki screams EXACTLY FIFTEEN MINUTES AFTER I ENTER REM SLEEP EVERY SINGLE NIGHT...sigh...and putting him in our bed), that I'm scared I'm going to crash my car on the commute. I literally cannot keep my eyes open. It is bad.

I don't think I can fit in a daytime nap. Take today's schedule, for example. Wake at 6:45 to nurse Loki. Bring Ander potty. Get both kids and myself ready and leave the house to arrive at mom's at 8:30 a.m. Then, I eat breakfast, check work e-mail, return one client phone call, and it's 9:30 a.m. Get Ander ready for playdate at the library at 10 a.m. Return at 12:30 to my mom's, eat lunch, and I only have about two hours left to work before childcare is done. If I nap, that takes up the work time. Sigh.

With Ander, we did a more gentle sleep training, where we went in the room and patted his back, and stayed nearby when he was awake, but didn't talk to him. But I think Ander was older.

I've heard people say that having a child means lack of sleep and parents choose it, so they should just deal. Those people are judgmental prats. (There, I said it. Ha!) Most important in this equation is that I'm falling asleep while driving my children, so something has to change.

But I don't think Alan or I can handle Loki crying. It's not even a philosophical objection. It's a physiological one.



Frog said...

Why not try short periods of time? I don't like to let them cry for long periods either, but for Tad we let him cry probably around the same age as Loki is now. Really, it only took about three days and the first was the worse. What about music in his room too? We played a cd for Tad and put it on repeat. He still must sleep with it on. Last night I put him to bed, forgot to turn CD on. Well, he started crying so I went in and he said on, that. He was pointing to music. I turned it on and he laid his head down and went to sleep. Sweet.

I know it's hard, but you definitely need to get some sleep. It will make him happier too.

Mommy said...

i would look at what is going on during the day. I have heard a theory that lack of sufficent sleep during the day affects babies night time sleeping as well.

also, my go to source of woes, is he teething?

Derwinicus said...

I hate CIO too but we've had to do it with Aidan. It makes me so sad to hear him cry but he often doesn't want us in there if we don't pick him up. When he wakes up crying, we go in, give him his soother and pat his bum. Sometimes he is fine with it, other times he gets so mad at us and screams. If he does that, we leave, let him cry for about 10 minutes or so and then try it again. If he's still made, we wait a little longer before going back in. It's sort-of the Ferber method but not to a T. We started that a month ago (10 months old) when I'd decided enough nursing at night. It was rough for the first week but then he got used to it. He still woke up but just putting the soother in did the trick. (And then he got sick and it all went to pot. lol)

Sammy Jankis said...

Loki is rather weird with it. I don't know, it is almost like he's experiencing night terrors or something. He starts this screeching scream and is inconsolable. If he actually opened his eyes and looked at us I would be more willing to try cry it out. But he doesn't actually seem to be awake. His eyes are closed and even after I pick him up he just screams and arches his back like he wants to get away from me. He doesn't calm down.

Stac Cole said...

I like Michelle's idea of music in his room. He is in a constant state of noise at daycare that it being completely silent may be making him agitated. If nothing else, it would drown out any sudden noises that are waking him up. And since his bedroom is where it is, and if he's starting the night off in his bed, could it be that something is coming by his window at night and waking him? Like a dog barking or a cat scratching?

Anonymous said...

Do you have a monitor in his room? If so, maybe if you turn it off or to the lowest setting you won't hear him until he is REALLY crying and needs you.